


Live a Little

by puff_the_magic_dragon



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Drinking, First Time, Fluff and Angst, Getting Together, M/M, Mutual Pining, Peer Pressure, Set early Season 1, aka Spence gets drunk and Derek realizes he's never been drunk before, first time drinking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-03 05:21:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,635
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24339562
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/puff_the_magic_dragon/pseuds/puff_the_magic_dragon
Summary: Derek drags Spencer out for a night with the team, refusing to take no for an answer anymore. Spencer is embarrassed because he's never been drunk before and things snowball from there.
Relationships: Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid
Comments: 8
Kudos: 414





	Live a Little

**Author's Note:**

> Hello my guys, and welcome to my first CM fic! I'm sure no one is reading these notes rn but fuck it, I'm adding them anyway.  
> Thanks to my buddy @hotwheels_kin for beta-ing, she's also probably going to write a sequel so keep an eye out for that...  
> Anyway, I don't have any warnings or anything so I'm gonna sign off now.  
> Enjoy!  
>  _Let me know if you have any ideas for cute fics between these two down in the comments :)_  
>  -Cody Helene

“You comin’ pretty boy?” Derek asked, slinging his coat over his shoulder as he packed up for the day. Spencer’s head snapped up from where he was working on some paperwork at his desk, his eyes blurry and unfocused. 

“Huh?” he asked, lifting a hand to rub at his eyes. Derek couldn’t help but think he looked like a kid up past bedtime. But he wasn’t going to be allowed to sleep anytime soon, the team had made a plan to go out for drinks and Derek would be damned if he let Spencer make one more excuse to avoid coming out with them. 

“Come on. Day’s over, time to drink.” he said as he walked over to Spencer’s chair, grabbed his stupid purple scarf, and wrapped it around the young doctor’s neck. Derek placed his hands on Spencer’s shoulders, leaning down until his mouth was next to his ear. “Time to get a bit wild, kid. The paperwork can wait ‘til Monday.” 

The kid looked up at him, eyes gone big as they darted around the office, looking for an escape route. 

“I don’t know, Derek, I’m pretty exh-” Derek pulled the chair out with Spencer in it, interrupting him. 

“Let’s end that sentence at pretty and get the night started.” he said, spinning Spencer around and offering him a hand up. “You’re not getting out of this one, JJ already agreed so there’s no one coming to your rescue, Princess.” 

Spencer sighed and took his hand, letting the older agent pull him up. 

“Fine but I'm not ‘getting wild’.” Spencer tried to bargain. Derek yanked him up, hard and fast enough that Spencer crashed into his chest. He wrapped an arm around the doctor’s waist as he tried to regain his balance, his hands trapped between their chests. 

“We’ll see about that, kid,” Derek said. He tweaked Spencer’s nose and released him, taking a step back. “Need a ride?” 

Spencer stayed silent a moment, seemingly a little spaced out and at a loss for words, but then nodded and turned to collect his things. “Yeah,” he swallowed, “I took the metro today, thank you.” 

If Derek wasn’t mistaken, he could see a slight blush of Spencer’s cheeks as he shoved his stuff into his satchel. He smiled to himself. He had been working with Spencer Reid, Resident Genius for a few months now, and, as much as he teased the kid as a joke, it made his heart beat a little faster every time his flirting seemed to have a result. Flustered Spencer was even cuter than normal Spencer, in Derek’s opinion. And Derek _did_ consider himself an expert on Spencer Reid. 

*****

The bar was crowded when they arrived, not unexpected for a Friday night in Dupont Circle, but Derek and Spencer found the rest of the team relatively quickly. They had staked out a corner booth near the back. 

Derek wasn’t blind to the stares they got as they made their way through the crowd. He wouldn’t pretend he wasn’t used to being leered at wherever he went, not even for the sake of modesty, but the stares only increased when he was alongside Spencer. The doctor didn’t realize, of course. He had no clue how attractive he was. Derek’s eyes landed on a man leaned against the far wall as his eyes roamed up and down over Spencer’s lanky body, his interest clear on his face. 

Without thinking, Derek reached out, sliding his hand into the small of Spencer’s back. The bar wasn’t so crowded that the man could have missed it, but Derek shot him a glare for good measure. Of course, Spencer didn’t miss it either. He tensed slightly under Derek’s touch, eyes moving to Derek, a confused look on his face. 

“Just don’t wanna lose you,” Spencer nodded and relaxed once again as they approached the back table. Derek glanced over his shoulder one last time to see the man had found a different sweet thing to hold his attention. Good. Derek did _not_ feel like listening to some beefcake chat up Spencer. 

“Spence! You came!” JJ said, drawing Derek’s attention back to the team just in time to steady Spencer as the already slightly tipsy agent crashed into him. Spencer laughed, letting JJ hug him for a long moment before pulling away. 

“Derek said I had no choice in the matter, so…” He raised his hands as if to say ‘here I am’ making Derek chuckle. 

“On her orders, kid,” he said, squeezing Spencer’s side before letting him go, confident that JJ wasn’t going to ambush him again. 

“That’s right, it’s about time you joined us.” She calmed down for a second, seeming more like sober JJ, but then she squealed and clapped her hands, turning to the table and grabbing two full shot glasses. “We saved you both a shot!” she said excitedly, shoving a glass at both of them. Derek took his willingly, unsurprised when Spencer just stared at his, unsure. 

“Come on kid, live a little,” he said, throwing back his shot, not letting it linger on his tongue. It burned going down, but Derek was used to it by now. Spencer eyed him carefully, then sighed and took the glass. He winced as he swallowed it and started coughing. Derek slapped his back. “Not a heavy drinker?” He asked with a laugh. Spencer just shook his head and coughed a few more times, and Derek couldn’t help the soft smile from spreading across his lips. 

“I’ll get us some beers.” he said, patting Spencer’s back one last time, lighter now, and turning on his heel. The smile stayed on his face until long after he reached the bar. 

*****

Spencer was starting on his third beer before Derek realized how gone the kid was. Or maybe he had already realized Spencer was far past tipsy but he didn’t want to admit that he should slow the kid down because drunk Spencer, leaning on Derek’s shoulder and giggling in his ear, was just about the best thing he’d seen in weeks. 

Derek was unsurprised to find Spencer was a happy drunk. He _was_ slightly surprised to find that he was cuddly, though. Spencer was relatively touch adverse in normal day-to-day sober life, Derek had caught onto that within the first few days working with him. But drunk Spencer was leaning heavily on him, his head on Derek’s shoulder, his body moving closer every chance he got to fill a gap between the two agents. As the time approached quarter past nine, Derek had no doubt Spencer would be in his lap by the end of the night if Derek did any less than fending him off with a stick. 

“Beer’s boring, Spence, let’s get something more fun!” a much more drunk Jennifer Jareau said as she grabbed Spencer’s hand and tried to pull him out of the booth and off of Derek. She actually succeeded. For a moment. Then Spencer came crashing back down, body hitting the booth, head landing on Derek’s thigh. He was expecting a groan or a yelp, but when he looked down the kid was just staring back up at him, big eyes wide and joyful, long brown hair messy and in his face. Derek reached down and brushed a few hairs away from his eyes. He knew the smile on his face was far too soft and caring to be giving to a coworker, but he didn’t necessarily care. Spencer Reid made him not care. 

“I think he’s had enough for tonight, JJ,” he said, not looking up from the man of his dreams who had, quite literally, fallen into his lap. Spencer kept looking back. “In fact,” He continued to brush away stray hairs, tucking them behind his ear, “I think it’s time to take him home.” 

Spencer pouted at that, cute and petulant, but he didn’t say a word in argument. Which was how Derek knew how right he was. Spencer never did as Derek said without a fight. 

“Are you sure you’re okay to drive?” Hotch, who was sober of course, asked from across the table. Derek smiled and nodded. 

“I’m good to go, bossman. Stopped drinking when I realized I need to take this one home sooner rather than later.” he said, ignoring the fact that what he said was true, and he had done so completely subconsciously, instead he poked Spencer’s side. Derek didn’t have the words to describe the emotion that bloomed within him when Spencer let out a surprised squeal that quickly shifted into a loud laugh. 

But if he were to guess, he’d have to admit it was something akin to love. 

Spencer squirmed on the bench seat, laughing, as Derek stopped poking, his hand spanning the kid’s ribs instead, feeling them constrict under his touch as the muscles bunched. Spencer’s laughing stopped suddenly, his eyes opening to stare up at Derek again. His hair had gone back to ruffled, all of Derek’s hard work gone, a deep blush had risen high on his cheeks from his laughter. 

“Home?” he asked, his voice almost too quiet to be heard over the din of the bar. The smile on Derek’s face had yet to slip and was only growing more loving by the second, with each movement of the doctor in his lap. 

“Yeah, pretty boy, let’s get you home.” 

Spencer nodded, struggling to stand, provoking a laugh from the team that Derek had almost forgotten was present. He could feel a blush of his own taking over his face and thanked god that his skin tone masked it better than the never-seen-the-sun vampire look Spencer seemed to go for. 

Eventually, Hotch took pity on the struggling kid and got up to give him a hand. He was thanked for his effort as the younger agent leaned in and placed a quick kiss on his boss’ cheek. Hotch, as patient as ever, just smiled and ruffled Spencer’s already messy hair. His tolerant reaction must have inspired the drunk man, however, because, for the next several seconds, Derek watched as Spencer stumbled around the booth, giving each team mate a kiss on the cheek and a cheesy smile before returning to Derek’s side. 

“Drive safe, boys,” Gideon said, a highly amused expression on his face. Derek nodded, wrapping an arm around Spencer as the boy wobbled concerningly. He waved to the team and started to lead Spencer away from the table when- “And Derek,” Derek looked over his shoulder to see Gideon’s amusement had slipped into something more of a worried expression. “Please don’t leave him alone.” 

Derek nodded. “Of course,” he said. Then he turned once again and led a stumbling Spencer Reid from the bar. 

*****

Spencer was about ten times more grumpy by the time they got to the car. He had continued to pout, his arms crossed over his chest both in defiance and against the cold. But he hadn’t said a word, much to Derek’s discomfort. 

Derek was not used to being near a _quiet_ Doctor Spencer Reid. He was used to Spencer ranting, used to him spouting off facts and interrupting at random intervals, used to him humming in agreement as if he had to have an input in every conversation. But he was not used to silence. 

As he put his keys in the ignition, after more or less lifting Spencer into the passenger side, he paused. Turning to lean against the driver side door, Derek didn’t bother to try to be stealthy as he stared the other man down. Now that they were alone and Spencer’s quietness had become evident, Derek realized that the kid had slowly gotten less and less talkative as the night had gone on. In fact, the drunker Spencer got, the less he spoke. 

Spencer either felt Derek’s eyes on him or noticed that Derek had yet to turn on the car, his eyes lifting from where he was staring at Derek’s hand that had dropped from the keys in the ignition to Derek’s thigh. 

“You alright, ki-” Spencer cut him off, his head tilting to the side like a curious puppy. 

“When you drive with your dates do you put your hand on their thigh?” he asked. 

Derek, more or less too stunned to answer, looked down at his thigh. “Uh…” 

“I see it all the time on TV, they mention it a lot in books too, but I’ve never experienced it personally. Is it something that the media embellishes? Is it something that-” Now it was Derek’s turn to interrupt because, as glad as he was that Spencer was talking, he did _not_ need to hear about the kid’s experiences with… Thigh touching. 

“Slow down, slow down,” Derek said, not thinking as he did, in fact, reach out and place his hand on Spencer’s lower thigh, just above his knee. Spencer’s eyes followed the entire movement. “You’ve been quiet the whole night, are you okay?” Spencer hummed. 

“Yeah, just, enjoying the quiet.” he said, shooting Derek a cheesy smile. A smile Derek was almost too distracted by to process Spencer’s words, but when he did, his brow furrowed. 

“Kid, it was loud as hell in there, are you sure-” 

“Not quiet in there,” Spencer said, lifting a hand and tapping at the side of his head. “Quiet in _here.”_ The smile was still on his face as he blinked, slowly and sleepily, as if he was struggling to keep his eyes open. “Not used to the quiet… It’s nice, not to have everything happening all at once. Never knew alcohol could do that.” And Derek knew that he should focus on the mental effect the alcohol was having on his friend, the wording that made it seem like the kid could become seriously dependent on it, just to shut up his brain. But it was what Spencer said at the end that caught and held his attention. 

“Reid, have you never been drunk before?” He asked, voice quiet but still too loud for the silent car. Spencer blinked again, processing the question, his eyes dilated by the lowlight and alcohol in his system. 

“I haven’t, no.” Derek’s stomach dropped. 

There he was with this kid, his co-worker, his _friend,_ totally and completely wasted for the first time in his life. Spencer hadn’t wanted to go out that night, he hadn’t wanted to drink, hadn’t wanted to get drunk. But Derek had made him. He had pressured him into doing something that Derek should have noticed he wasn’t comfortable with, he was a _profiler_ for god’s sakes, it was his job to notice when people were uncomfortable, when they were nervous or scared. And he _had_ noticed, he realized, looking back. 

He just hadn’t cared. 

“Why didn’t you tell me you hadn’t been drunk before?” He asked. Spencer sighed, sinking in on himself a bit as his smile slipped. He ran a hand through his messy hair. 

“I’m twenty-four, Der,” he said. He had never called Derek that before, but Derek decided that then was not the time nor place to think about that. “Everyone’s been drunk by the time they’re twenty-four. I was embarrassed, I…” Spencer turned his face away, looking out the passenger side window. “I didn’t want you to have even more of a reason to think of me as a kid. I was afraid you’d think I was… inexperienced.” 

“You are inexperienced, Spencer,” Derek said, regretting it immediately when the younger man flinched. “It’s not a bad thing.” he continued quickly, squeezing Spencer’s leg. “You and that big brain of yours were just too focused on learning to have time to do the things all us non-genius's did. Like drinking irresponsible and, honestly, concerning amounts of alcohol.” He waited a moment, listening for Spencer’s answer, hoping he would turn to look at him again. Derek sighed. 

“Pretty boy, look at me,” he said eventually. After a moment, Spencer did. “You have no reason to be embarrassed. Inexperience, it’s not… We’re all inexperienced at one point or another, and, sure, maybe you’re a little older than most people when they first get drunk, but don’t worry about me thinking you’re childish because of that. In fact, I find it kind of charming…” 

“Really?” Spencer asked, finally speaking after another painful moment of silence. Derek nodded. 

“And if there’s anything else you’ve never done and don’t feel safe to try alone, I’ll be there to protect you, no judgement guaranteed. Just _please_ tell me when we’re trying something new.” Derek worried that maybe he had let too much emotion slip out, that he showed Spencer too much of what he felt for the kid. But Spencer just nodded, no suspicious look that Derek was sure he’d get if he were sober. 

“Thanks, Derek,” he said, his smile making its way back onto his face. 

“Anytime, pretty boy.” 

With that, Derek started the car and if his hand didn’t stray from the top of Spencer’s knee the entire ride home, neither man mentioned it. 

*****

Derek decided on bringing Spencer back to his place since he had to keep an eye on the kid anyway. The decision was only made easier when Spencer fell asleep in his passenger seat just before Derek realized he had never actually been to Spencer’s apartment before and didn’t even know what street he lived on. 

He pulled into the reserved parking spot for building residents and turned to wake Spencer, finally moving his hand from his thigh and up to his shoulder, shaking him lightly. Spencer groaned and snuggled deeper into his seat, rubbing his face against the leather. It was cute enough that Derek almost decided to let him sleep a little longer, but Spencer was a tall man and, though Derek had seen him sleep curled up in the jet seats countless times already, a bed would be far more comfortable. 

“Come on, sleeping beauty, time to get inside.” he said, shaking Spencer a little harder. Spencer opened his eyes, looking at Derek as a sleepy smile spread across his lips, his earlier distress and unhappiness forgotten during his nap. He rubbed a hand across the side of his face, and nodded. 

Derek spent the next several minutes maneuvering Spencer out of his car and through the front door of his building, waving to his doorman as who tried to hide his smile as Spencer said, quiet loudly, _‘ooh fancy, you have a doorman?’_ Derek just sighed and pushed Spencer into the elevator. 

The rest of the way after that was relatively easy. Spencer, who was finally fully awake, seemed to have gained some energy and soberness from his nap, at least enough to stand on his own two feet and walk without stumbling, and was now walking on his own instead of being half-carried by Derek. Derek still kept a watchful eye on him but was thankful when he was able to unlock his door without having to worry about Spencer falling on his face. 

He got his door open and ushered Spencer in, following closely. He was expecting Spencer to want to go to bed, considering how exhausted he had been just moments before. What he was _not_ expecting was to be shoved against the door as he closed it, Spencer completely pressed against his front, his hands cupping Derek’s face, his lips pressing hard against Derek’s. 

He let out a surprised noise, kissing Spencer back immediately without thinking, one hand going to Spencer’s hip, pulling him closer, the other tangling in his hair. Spencer kissed like he talked, precise and unrelenting, but after a moment he yielded to Derek, letting him take control. Derek pushed off the door, flipping them as Spencer melted further into him, his hands slipping up the back of Derek’s shirt. Derek smiled and nipped his lip lightly, before pulling away far enough to start kissing down his neck. 

“I-” Spencer said, voice broken, “I’ve never done this before…” his words were surprisingly clear for a drunk man- 

_Fuck._

Derek froze completely. Somehow, in between getting Spencer inside and Spencer ambushing him, Derek had forgotten that he was still drunk. Derek had never thought that he’d be that person — the man that takes advantage of a drunken crush — he’d always thought he was better than that, _stronger_ than that. But one kiss from the man of his dreams and all his morals had gone out the window. Gideon had trusted him, _Spencer_ had trusted him to protect him, but the moment Derek had gotten him alone he became the person he was supposed to protect Spencer from. He’d failed them both. He’d failed himself. He remembered the first day he saw the kid, all big, bright eyes and an even bigger, brighter brain, excited for his first day and too smart for his own good. He had sworn in that moment that he’d do everything in his power to keep him from harm, shield him from the monsters they faced everyday at work. He never had thought he’d have to protect him from monsters in his own apartment. He- 

He heard sniffling. 

Drawn from his downward spiral, Derek lifted his head from when it was still buried in Spencer’s neck, and looked up. If his heart had dropped to his stomach before, it crashed through the floor then, because Spencer was sniffing, his eyes wet and shiny with tears as he obviously tried to keep himself from crying. Not only had he taken advantage of Spencer, but now he had made him cry too? His hand dropped from Spencer’s hair, cupping his cheek. 

“Spence, I’m sorry, I-” 

“You said you would protect me.” Spencer cut him off, his voice stiff and pained. Derek nodded pathetically. 

“I know, and I’m-” 

“You said you’d protect me and you wouldn’t judge me as long as I _told_ you.” Spencer interrupted again and Derek was a little confused now because he wasn’t judging Spencer for anything. “And what, now you changed your mind? Because a twenty-four year old who’s never kissed someone is _so_ disagreeable? So _embarrassing?”_ A tear slipped down Spencer’s cheek, Derek quickly wiped it away. 

“Kid, what’re you-” Derek started, but it was obvious that that was the wrong thing to say when a sob wretched itself from Spencer’s chest. 

“I’m _not_ a kid, Derek. I thought you agreed with that earlier. Just because I’m _inexperienced_ doesn’t mean I’m a kid.” His voice was rising, his tears falling faster, and it finally dawned on Derek. He had been too caught up in his own troubles to realize that this wasn’t about him. It was about Spencer, about what he had said earlier that night, about Derek promising to be there for him as long as Spencer told him when they were trying something new. 

About Derek remembering Spencer was drunk and freezing up just as Spencer did just that. And Spencer thinking Derek had stopped because he was inexperienced or embarrassing. 

“Spencer, no, I don’t think… I’m not judging you.” Derek said, his brain still working on what to say, how to explain. 

“Sure, Der, like I said, I’m just too repulsive. You like someone who knows what they’re doing.” He sniffed and wiped away a few tears. “Can you let me go now? I’d like to go to sleep, please.” 

Derek stepped away, which he should have done a long time before, so he was no longer pinning Spencer to the door. He tried to find something to do with his hands that _wasn’t_ touching Spencer, no matter how much he wanted to prove that he wanted him. He crossed his arms then decided against that and shoved his hands in his pockets. 

“Spencer, I don’t care if you’re experienced or inexperienced. I don’t want someone else, it’s always been you, ever since we started working together.” 

_“Then why did you stop kissing me!”_ Spencer yelled, and the dam broke. If Derek thought Spencer was crying before, he was full on sobbing now. Derek needed to say something fast, because watching Spencer sob in his entry hall, unable to reach out and comfort him… He had never seen anything worse and that was saying something considering his everyday life. 

“You’re drunk.” Derek blurted out. Spencer’s heavy breathing stopped. He lifted his face from where it was buried in his hands. “I stopped kissing you because I remembered that you’re drunk, not only that but you’re drunk for the first time _ever._ I didn’t stop kissing you because you have no experience with that, I stopped kissing you because you have no experience with the stupid things being drunk will make you do. Like…” _Kissing me._ But that was left unsaid. 

“Spencer, you know the kind of people we deal with _every day._ And the thought that… That I could be one of them…” Derek trailed off, looking down at his feet. 

“You thought you were taking advantage of me.” Spencer said after a moment of silence, his voice barely above a whisper. Derek nodded but didn’t say anything, just stared at the ground, surprised when he saw Spencer's shoes step just in front of his own. “Derek, I’m sorry I put you in that position.” He reached out, wrapping his fingers around one of Derek’s wrist, probably because his hands were still in his pockets. 

“It’s not your fault, I-” Derek started but Spencer shushed him. 

“You’re a good man, Derek Morgan. You put up with my incessant ramblings, you’re always there to protect me when I do something stupid… I trust you.” A long finger skidded over his cheek, hooking under his chin and making him look up. “You could _never_ be one of them, and I’m sorry I put you in a position that made you think you were.” Spencer leaned in and pressed a quick, soft kiss to Derek’s cheek. “Please don’t _ever_ think that you’re any less than the best, most respectful, most considerate man alive. It’s the way your mother raised you. It’s why I’m so endeared by you.” 

Derek took his hand from his pocket, tangling his fingers with Spencer’s. 

“My mom would love you, you know that?” was all Derek could think to say. Spencer laughed. 

“Well let’s wait ‘til I meet her before we jump to conclusions.” he said with a smile, his eyes completely free of tears. “We can’t discount the Reid Effect.” 

“Can I take you out?” Derek blurted, completely disregarded the conversation. Spencer blinked up at him, either still too drunk or too tired to follow the abrupt change of topic. “On a date. Will you go out on a date with me?” he clarified. Spencer chuckled and shook his head. 

“Only if we can go to bed right now. I’m exhausted and the beer is wearing off.” Derek smiled, messing up Spencer’s hair and pulling him closer, kissing his forehead. 

“I wish everyone would stop doing that.” Spencer muttered, trying to tame his hair, making Derek laugh. He stepped away from Spencer, as much as he didn’t want to. 

“I’ll go find you something to sleep in.” he said, turning and walking toward the bedroom. “You can have the bed, I’ll-” 

“Der,” Spencer interrupted, obviously close behind him. “If you are about to say you’ll sleep on the couch or the floor I will physically _tie_ you to that bed.” he threatened, startling a laugh from Derek. He looked over his shoulder at the man following him into the bedroom. 

“Whatever you say, pretty boy.” Derek said, lacing his voice with as much innuendo as he possibly could, throwing in a wink for good luck. 

A blush spread quickly across Spencer’s face, and Derek thanked whatever gods were listening that the events of the night hadn’t lessened his ability to provoke that pretty pink flush. 

*****


End file.
